WHAT DOES

Lt. Colonel Ballou, here's one for you.

An out-of-towner accidentally drives his car into a deep ditch on the side of a country road. Luckily a farmer happened by with his big old horse named Benny.

The man asked for help. The farmer said Benny could pull his car out. So he backed Benny up and hitched Benny to the man's car bumper.

Then he yelled, "Pull, Nellie, pull." Benny didn't move.

Then he yelled, "Come on, pull Ranger." Still, Benny didn't move.

Then he yelled really loud, "Now pull, Fred, pull hard." Benny just stood.

Then the farmer nonchalantly said, "Okay, Benny, pull."

Benny pulled the car out of the ditch.

The man was very appreciative but curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times.

The farmer said, "Oh, Benny is blind, and if he thought he was the only one pulling he wouldn't even try."

"When liberty is removed by force, it can be restored by force, when freedom and liberties are relinquished voluntarily they shall never be recovered"

Ok, it wasn't good. How about this one...
What do you call 10 rabbits walking backwards?

... A receding hair line.

"When liberty is removed by force, it can be restored by force, when freedom and liberties are relinquished voluntarily they shall never be recovered"

A legally blind man with a seeing eye dog walks into a grocery store. The man walks to the middle of the store, picks up the dog by the tail, and starts swinging the dog around in circles over his head. The store manager approaches the blind man swinging the dog and says, "Pardon me. May I help you?" The blind man says, "No thanks. I'm just looking around."

"Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice, moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue"

I am happy you enjoyed that one Colonel. Another?
Maybe you've heard this one. Two hunting buddies are out in the woods.
When a hungry Grisly Bear starts chasing them. The two climb a tree, but the bear starts climbing up after them. The first guy pulls out his sneakers from his knapsack and puts them on.

His buddy says, "What the frick are you doing?! He says, "I figure, we'll have to jump down and make a run for it." The second guy says, "Are you fricken crazy? You can't outrun a Grisly"!

The first guy says, "Who said anything about out running the bear, I only have to outrun you…"

"When you're determined to survive, you leave nothing to chance."

How's the Colonel today? Any ghosts or Goblins at the door last night?

"When you're determined to survive, you leave nothing to chance."

Colonel, that's a shame, sorry to learn about that. It was quiet around these parts. My driveway is about 1/8 mile up a slight grade and most of the kids don’t bother to make the effort. The neighbor stopped by for some pie and coffee. He’s great guy. He wanted me to look at his Winchester model 94 in 30-30. A case got caught and burred the extractor a bit. I just touched it with a file for him. Here in northern Minnesota, the lever action 30-30 has always been one of the most popular choices for folks heading to their deer stands.

"When you're determined to survive, you leave nothing to chance."

Colonel, the deer here typically dress out about 150 to 200 lbs. I am happy you had an opportunity to go fishing with your boy. I bet he’ll remember that time you spent together for years to come my friend. That brings me back thinking about catching catfish. As a young man, I sit for hours by the old rail road bridge and fish for cats and bull heads. My Mom would cook them up for me. That was good eats indeed. She wouldn’t clean them though.

"When you're determined to survive, you leave nothing to chance."

lived in california my whole life raising my kids here now the fishing here is not the best everywhere with exceptions some pleaces ive got a friend from maine says no comparison to his home state weve been talking about going hopefully soon.